19. May 2026

Self Care

Self care is often spoken about as a luxury, something reserved for weekends, spa days, or rare moments of quiet. In reality, it is far more fundamental than that. Self care is not an indulgence but a necessary, ongoing practice of attending to both our inner and outer worlds. It is about how we relate to ourselves—how we listen, respond, and nurture our own needs in the midst of everyday life.

At its core, self care begins with awareness. This means noticing when you are tired, overwhelmed, or emotionally stretched, and responding with kindness rather than criticism. Many people develop a habit of pushing through discomfort, ignoring signals from their body and mind until they reach burnout. A more sustainable approach involves recognising these early signs and allowing space for rest, reflection, or support.

Caring for your physical appearance—your facial aesthetics and hair, for example—can be a meaningful part of this process. While these aspects are sometimes dismissed as superficial, they often play a deeper psychological role. Taking time to cleanse your skin, maintain a skincare routine, or style your hair in a way that feels authentic can foster a sense of self-respect and identity. These small rituals can become grounding practices, offering moments of calm and control in an otherwise busy world. When approached mindfully, they are not about meeting external standards but about expressing care for yourself in a visible, tangible way.

Hair care, similarly, can carry emotional significance. Our hair is often tied to how we see ourselves and how we believe others perceive us. Changes in hair—whether through stress, illness, or life transitions—can impact self-esteem. Creating a routine that supports healthy hair, or simply taking time to appreciate and tend to it, can reinforce a sense of continuity and self-worth. These acts, though simple, can contribute to a broader sense of wellbeing.

However, self-care is not only about what we do externally. It is equally, if not more, about the internal work of understanding ourselves. This is where psychodynamic counselling can offer valuable support. As a psychodynamic counsellor, I work with clients to explore the unconscious patterns and past experiences that shape their current thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. Often, difficulties with self care are rooted in deeper beliefs—perhaps a sense that one’s needs are unimportant, or that care must be earned rather than freely given.

Through the therapeutic relationship, we begin to uncover these patterns. We look at how early relationships may have influenced your ability to care for yourself, and how these dynamics might still be playing out in your life today. This process is not about quick fixes, but about developing a deeper understanding of yourself. Over time, this understanding can lead to more compassionate self-relating and more consistent, meaningful self care practices.

Importantly, therapy provides a space where you are prioritised. In a world that often demands constant productivity, having a dedicated time to focus on your inner experience can be transformative. It allows you to reconnect with parts of yourself that may have been neglected or silenced.

Self care, then, is not a checklist or a trend. It is a relationship—with your body, your mind, and your history. Whether it takes the form of a quiet skincare routine, caring for your hair, or engaging in deeper psychological work, it is ultimately about recognising your own value and responding to it with care.